So my trick of using a hair tie to extend my jeans along with a belly band stopped being effective. I am now 100% in maternity clothes. Wow, there are some really ugly clothes. But amazing how much more comfy maternity jeans are. I went to get a few necessary items with Mom last week and I was in the fitting room trying on jeans and I lost my belly band. It's like a half tube top that is fitted and helps extend the life of your regular pants. I lost it. I looked everywhere in the fitting room. Finally I asked Mom if she had it maybe in the jeans I had given her that I'd tried on. She looked through them and next thing you know the sales staff is looking for my belly band. One lady asks me, "Are you sure it's not on you?" I said, yea, cause I'm that stupid that I wouldnt be able to find a band on my body. Guess who's that stupid!? It had made its way up under my bra. Where my maternity jeans now sit.
I'm 34 today. Crazy, age is relative I guess to how you feel. I'm feeling 34 right now. I'm still quite the mess. I went all day Wed without throwing up and Jason announces to everyone, "Missy went a whole day without puking." Jinxed me and I've thrown up more the past 2 days than I have in a few weeks. I have a busted blood vessel in my eye for effect.
Had an appt with the high risk dr for my first trimester screen. We got to spend about 30 minutes with the babies, watching them move and flip and wiggle and dance. Absolutely still amazes me that this is going on, inside my body!! Baby B was laying right on top of Baby A. I'll never forget finding out we had twins. I was getting my first draining and Jason was at my head and Dr B had already told us he was certain we only had 1 baby. I told him I was certain he was wrong, that there were 2. He has the ultrasound moving around and says, oh look, there's the sac for the baby. And a few seconds later he says, and there is the other sac. Amazing when you pray for something and you know, even thru the hard times and seasons of fear and frustration, that you will have your answer to your prayers, hearing it announced is a feeling that I can't describe. And then hearing my mother's intuition was correct with 2 babies, speechless.
Yesterday we had dinner with the parents and kids. I got my coveted Michael Kors bracelet from the kids, handpicked cards from each of them, a Willow Tree figurine of a couple with a pregnant mom and the last card I got was one Jason had from the babies. He wrote me a note from them and when it started "Dear Mommy," I lost it. I'm going to be someone's mommy. Finally.
We are going through some strange seasons. As everyone does. And we are trying to figure out best we can how to make sure everyone is on the right track, no one gets left behind and everyone knows their place in the family. We sought the help of a family counselor to help guide us. I won't say much other than, when you pray about something and you know it to be true, it's ok to listen to your heart. When you are given circumstances and you do the best you can, it's ok to fail if you learn from your mistakes and move forward. You get out of what you put into life. If you put in hard work and effort and blood, sweat and tears, you'll most likely reap some benefits. If you go through life manipulating, controlling and being sneaky, my belief is that too will catch up to you. If you have the desire to make your family as well rounded, God fearing and God loving as you can, my trust and belief is that you will have a loving, kind family.
Blood, sweat and tears. That about sums up life right now. Through swollen ovaries, (still) busted blood vessels, gifts that make you so happy they make you cry, and circumstances that make you want to beat your head against a wall, life is still, and always, beautiful.
I'm blessed. This year I will give birth to 2 little blessings that will know me, love me and call me Momma. There is nothing else I need!