Monday, May 17, 2010

I'd sure hate to break down here...

I gave my best friend permission to air all my dirty laundry on facebook if she hears a certain someone's name come out of my mouth. Not an awful guy but not good for me. I deserve better.

The "job of my dreams" turned out to be another dead end road paved with pretty lies and broken dreams. To quote Julie Roberts. I had some other opportunities I could have explored within that company but I was impressed with the position, not the people, so I'm moving on. I deserve better.

I have 3 interviews tomorrow. 2 that I'm not overly excited about, 1 that would be a job right up my alley. Director of the office and sales of a plastic surgeon/day spa. Oh yea. I'm not really wanting to be a Internet sales person for cars but I will if I have to. But I know I deserve better.

For the life of me I can't figure out why something hasn't happened for me. The whole guys/dating/blah blah blah I understand. You have to go through a lot of yes, no's, maybe's, not a chances, to get to someone you consider worth you time enough to spend effort on. You'd think finding a job would be the easier of the two. Here's my qualifications, here's my income average, here's my experience. BUT APPARENTLY I'M NOT HIREABLE. Had to get that off my chest. I'm talking to owners of companies. I'm talking to presidents of companies. Something is going to get me out of this rut I'm in, I'm going to make more than I expected, I'm going to have more responsibility than I think I'm capable of, I'm going to be as successful *IF NOT MORE SO* than I was. Because I deserve it, I'm capable of it and I'm worth someone's time and energy to hire me.

Yes I feel like a loser. Yes I feel like a failure. Yes I feel lost and insecure and sad. However, those moments are fleeting because I don't let myself believe them. I'm hot. I'm sassy. I have experience, I can sell anything, I can make people laugh, I can build relationships, I can make people feel great about themselves and I can do more than I give myself credit for.

I'd sure hate to break down here...because I deserve better. And I'll find it.

I'm blessed. I'm not forgotten, I'm moving forward even when it's easier to stay stagnant and I'm faithful that my life is about to change in a really, really positive way. It has to. Because I'm not breaking down. Here or anywhere else. I'm moving forward and I will find the best for me!!

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